Saturday, August 23, 2008

what if...

fri marks the last tutorial we'll ever have in NY.
coming to think of it, it really seems not long ago that i had my first tutorial too...
life seems to be in a kind of time warp lately where it speeds up and slows down at moments when u least want it.

Time! Freeze! Put ur hands up in e air and don't move!

frankly speaking, after 3 long years, fighting and crawling till this moment, now that i'm gonna reach the peak, suddenly i dun wanna go there all the way anymore for i know that after the peak lies a free falling cliff. so many uncertainties. after nov 18th this year, i'll step out of ny to become an alumni member. and then move on to the next phase of life where 2 years will be spent in the army and then later to uni. 2 years is indeed a long time. would the frens u made in jc just simply fade away into the nxt phase of life or will it really be frens forever like they all say. at this point, everytime i reflect upon my life, i cant help but ask what if...

i had not entered ny in the first place?
i had not retained?
i was in a different class?
i did not join DB?
i chose to spend more time with the class last yr instead of the DB ppl or the 29-ers?

would things now be different? yes.
would i like such a lifestyle? maybe.

BUT... if given a choice to start all over again, knowing such things would happen, would i have made the same choices as i once did?

i would say yes to most of them. for each and every choice i made led to different outcomes and allowed me to meet the dear frens i have today...

imagine no ny = no 0622, no 0728, no krt, no db that is the equivalent to about 100 people disappearing from my life excluding the other frens made along the way like the 1st 3 months ppl, the 0729 ppl, the pe class ppl etc.

this whole year really fleeted by. it was in jan when aft my op when i tot i wld quit frm db as i felt like i was dragging the team down wif such pathetic fitness level then. then i held on week after week at a time. then came march block test. later april was A div. we cried. we parted our ways. yet our bonds still held strong. then june. mid years. then now end august. couple days left to GP prelims and officially having the last tut in our jc education.

darn 3 years ago in ny i wld nv in my wildest dreams have said what im gonna say now...
i think im gonna miss ny.
my class of 21 girls and one guy (i gotta admit its awkward at times yet there are many fond memories too). the school which i did many ridiculous stuff (like photocopy my face with mel, jj, bourne haha). the gym where we slogged like mad. the chicken rice store which seem to be the staple diet for 2 years of my life. the track where i broke my 2.4 timing into the 9 min barrier. the pull up bar where i hit 30 pull ups in one shot. most importantly my frens... the thing that kept me going on despite all odds, without them this school is nothing. with them its everything :)

and to my dear class...
i know i haven really gotta know most of u as well as i prob shld. but i just hope that our class will remain tight and closely knitted even after our days in NY are over. haha. life will not be the same without u guys (erm i mean girls, and guy for gabriel lol) one for all, all for one. lets help each other reach the finish line together at the same time to share the gold medal! for A's in the A levels! and really frens forever!